this turbulent love

Chapter 38

Chapter 38

From the day when he decided to exchange and study, Gu Yan began to prepare for this matter.

He greeted Li Sheng and Wu Yu who had come back, beat them with their exaggerated envious and jealous eyes, and then went to Professor Chen to prepare for the next thing, and by the way, the procedures to be done All solved together.

After running around with Professor Chen and handing in the project with him, Gu Yan returned to Professor Chen's office. Gu Yan solemnly said "thank you" to Professor Chen, and then he was chased away by Professor Chen loudly. After coming out, when Gu Yan closed the door with a smile, he clearly saw Professor Chen's ears turning red, the arrogant Professor Chen.

When he returned to the dormitory, he was dragged out by Li Sheng and Wu Yu who had prepared early for a meal, and then wandered around the surrounding streets in a daze. Gu Yan wasn't very used to them doing this, and this made him feel a sense of parting emotion.But when Gu Yan turned his head to see their smiling faces, he laughed, hey, what's the matter, let them go.

The three of them finally took a look around the nearby places they had been to. They had a stomach ache the day before, and they had a stomach ache all night, and all of them immediately showed fatigue on their faces.Considering that Gu Yan was going there tomorrow, Li Sheng and the others did not continue to drag Gu Yan to another place, but went back to the dormitory after eating supper, continued to play Dou Dizhu, and then pushed Gu Yan. Yan went to bed.

Gu Yan looked at them amusedly, well, he really regarded him as a child, and obediently lay down on the bed, covered himself with the quilt, and closed his eyes.Hearing the sound of them going to bed one after another, and soon there was the sound of shallow snoring, but the Jian Mo that he had been suppressing during the day and not thinking about it poured out in Gu Yan's mind, and the night seemed to make him feel helpless. Sleep well, he blinked tiredly, trying to make himself fall asleep, but those memories invaded arrogantly and could not be refused.

All the memories condense, the past between him and Jian Mo, the difference between Jian Mo and Xiao Qian, and the unbroken but crossed road between them.He smiled wryly, as if even remembering didn't make him feel better, as if he always took the initiative to come forward, from wishful thinking to be friends with him, to unconsciously falling in love with Jian Mo, to the last two being together, he At first, I thought this was the normal state between them, but now I realized that this is not the case. The fact is that these are also my own wishful thinking, and Jian Mo didn't seem to express anything too much.

See, this is the result of forcing.Gu Yan bent at an ugly angle, blinked, and looked at the ceiling above his head.The scenes before his eyes were all the black and white silent films they had made before, and those unwavering footsteps seemed to be illusory. He was tired, and after walking alone for so long, it was time to stop and think clearly.Thinking back, he felt a little sad. He didn't know if he could believe the past happiness. Probably since he fell in love with that person, everything had already started to go off the rails.

However, at least now, he should escape.

It wasn't until Gu Yan got into the car with his big bags and small bags that he really felt that he was going to escape for a while, but he didn't know what it would be like when he came back.He looked out of the window complicatedly, Li Sheng and Wu Yu were waving at him outside the window, he suppressed the emotions in his eyes, smiled brightly, and then waved his hands broadly to indicate that it was nice to have them.

There was a lot of noise in the train, and there was instant noodles and mixed unpleasant smells everywhere. The people sitting nearby were not Gu Yan’s classmates but other strangers, because when Gu Yan agreed, Professor Chen immediately went to make up for a ticket. , so Gu Yan unconsciously breathed a sigh of relief, now he probably can't bear to smile when facing people he doesn't know very well.

Picking up the phone, Gu Yan didn't know what he was thinking in a daze. It took him a long time to come back to his senses. After unlocking it, he found Jian Mo from the information bar. After typing a line, there was a long silence before pressing the send button, and then turning off the phone.After doing these things, Gu Yan seemed to have done something very strenuous, even his breathing became thicker, and sweat broke out on his forehead in an instant.

There was a child on the opposite side who was watching Gu Yan's series of actions intently. Gu Yan smiled at him, and the child was not afraid of life, so he gave Gu Yan a silly smile.

Gu Yan looked at the child, then took out the snacks in his bag to him, and then called the child's mother to eat together, but he turned his head to the window absent-mindedly, as if he was shrouded in darkness, feeling extremely uncomfortable.

Jian Mo over there was preparing his luggage for his return. He came back a day early. He wanted to surprise Gu Yan and see Gu Yan laughing and jumping into his arms.Thinking of the birthday party with Xiaoqian yesterday, he was a little lost.

His birthday present for Xiaoqian had been prepared long ago, and he would have given it to him even if there was no such competition.When he saw him that night, he looked a lot haggard, his eyes dimmed, and he only smiled habitually when he saw him.He felt a slight pain in his heart, but he was not as violent as before, as if he wanted to tear something apart. It seemed that something was different, and he was a little surprised by the change in his mentality.

Quietly began to eat, as usual, except that Xiaoqian in the past always laughed sincerely, instead of being numb and empty like now.He wanted to say something, but helplessly, he didn't know what to say at all.He knew about Xiaoqian and that person, and he knew all the twists and turns during the period. He didn't know where to start; I think he might not be able to speak so vividly. In his eyes, it is purely technical ability, and there is no surprise to talk about.

After thinking about it, Jian Mo sighed. He felt sorry for Xiao Qian who was opposite him, but he knew very clearly that he could not bring him anything.As for that person, he lowered his eyes, of course he knew that that person was on the verge of collapse and went crazy, he knew how much effort that person had spent trying to find Xiaoqian who was hiding, how many years of trouble, and how much wind and rain was caused.He looked at the shiny plate. These two people clearly love each other so much, but they went through all kinds of twists and turns.

He froze for a moment, if it was the original self, he would probably feel so distressed that he would wish to find that person, so that he would never appear in front of Xiaoqian, and then use all his abilities to hide Xiaoqian better and do his best Try to give Xiaoqian happiness, even if he knows he can't.So what now?Since when did he start looking at them from the perspective of an outsider?

Yu Wenqian on the opposite side looked at Jian Mo's silent and absent-minded appearance. He knew that Jian Mo wanted to start a topic, but of course he knew that Jian Mo didn't know how to start.He pulled the corners of his mouth and laughed:

"Jian Mo, Gu Yan's matter has been hidden from me for so long, when are you going to tell me?"

Jian Mo suddenly raised his head to look at Yu Wenqian, with surprise in his eyes, but less flustered, he looked like a kid who just fell in love, not the same as before.Yu Wenqian finally laughed when he saw him like this, Jian Mo finally found that person, how could he not know Jian Mo's mood, but he couldn't respond to him, it's really good now, he hopes that Jian Mo To be happy, not like myself.

He thought, after a long time, the cloud of sorrow had finally dissipated a little in his heart.

He chatted with him that night, and he finally figured out the change in himself.He has an obsession with Xiaoqian, like there is something by your side but you can't get it anyway, you have spent almost all of your life doing it, like eating and drinking The water is generally natural, and you can't let it go.

Even after such a long time, he no longer understands the difference between liking or love, friendship or love, and perhaps more family affection, but no one has ever been able to tell him these things, and no one can bring him along like Gu Yan. Step into another life by yourself.Yu Wenqian has been tortured and saddened by his love for so long, so why hasn't he walked alone in pain and mud for so long?

And now, someone is finally willing to stretch out his hand to save him from the numbness and darkness of living in the shadows, how could he not know until now?He thought of what Gu Yan told him last to take care of himself, and he felt a warm current rushing through his heart, which he had never experienced before.

His parents have had various things since he was a child, and they treated him very well, but those who are really familiar with him and who really spend time with him are not as good as Aunt Sun who brought him up.He has been better than other children since he was a child, but he can't get short-term company from his parents, maybe it's just a simple compliment. He can only make himself stronger and stronger to cover up his desire. He has no choice. He envies other children who can enjoy themselves. Calling Mom and Dad, but he can't.

It wasn't until Xiaoqian's appearance that he felt that there was sunshine, there were colors, and there were many, many.His past is so simple and monotonous that it can be seen at a glance. He only grows up, then becomes silent, and finally becomes strong. Until now, the self who looks extremely indifferent is extremely persistent.

Thinking about these things as if suddenly enlightened, after spending his birthday with Xiaoqian, he sent Xiaoqian back. He couldn't wait to go back to his hotel and booked a plane ticket, but it was too late, today's latest All classes are gone.He suppressed his urgency and booked the earliest flight tomorrow.

Jian Mo got up at four o'clock the next day. He wanted to see Gu Yan sooner. This kind of intense excitement made him sleepless at night. He woke up at dawn, hurriedly checked out of the room and rushed to the hospital. Went to the airport.He wanted to tell Gu Yan a lot of things. Before talking about him, he said that he wanted to slowly confess to Gu Yan a lot of things that he thought he couldn't say before, but now he wanted to share them with Gu Yan.

These were things that Jian Mo had never experienced in his previous life. From the beginning, he let himself be imprisoned in Yu Wenqian, and there was no one else, and what Yu Wenqian brought to him was never this.He was not sure when he was with Gu Yan before, he knew that he had a crush on Gu Yan, and he tried his best to be nice to Gu Yan, but he didn't know what was going to happen next.He likes Gu Yan, but just likes, that's not love.

But now that he knows, he probably fell in love with Gu Yan, like Gu Yan loves him, is there anything better than being in love with each other?So at that time, he would not be able to write down the things between him and Xiaoqian that he could write for a long time before, and he would not be able to stay in the study room where he could spend a day in the past. Unknowingly, he wanted to stay with Gu Yan forever, no matter what. what are you doing.

It was too early, so Jian Mo had to wait outside the airport for several hours, his legs were numb from the cold morning wind, and his body felt so cold that he was unconscious.

When the airport staff came to open the door, they saw a tall figure standing up slowly, as if playing a slow movie, frame by frame.The man's legs seemed to be numb from waiting, so he limped over with his big and small luggage.

He is a very tall and handsome man, with the aura of 'no one should enter', but the act of trying to keep his back straight while pitifully moving his huge luggage is even more distressing.The female staff member directly arrested two male staff members to help Jian Mo.The two staff members rolled their eyes, but after seeing Jian Mo, they still tried their best to complete the formalities all the way to Jian Mo, and sent him to the waiting airport before leaving.

Jian Mo tried his best to let himself walk more normally. He took all the luggage that Gu Yan prepared for him by himself, which made him feel a little difficult. Fortunately, it will be much better when the strength passes. After thanking those few people, Only then did he have the energy to turn on his phone, Gu Yan must have chattered a lot in it.In order to make himself less excited, he directly told Gu Yan that he was coming back today, so he simply turned off the phone.

There was indeed a text message from Gu Yan on the phone. He opened it with a smile, and then the smile on his face froze instantly. He looked at the words on it in disbelief. These words were easy to understand, but he couldn't read a single word. Clear, why can't he believe a word? !

"Goodbye, Jian Mo. I think it's time for us to end."

The author has something to say: ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh~

I haven't been able to write very much, but I didn't expect to write it the day before going to school!

Hey, it's finally smooth.

I think it's time to abuse Jian Mo, a flirtatious bastard! ~